The Pub Landlord

 

So it all started out with hearsay, as these things generally do. My dear husband was diagnosed with HD a year ago and it’s fair to say for him exhaustion and sleep deprivation comes along with that. This when he tires can trigger physical symptoms, poor balance, jerky movements and slurred speech. Whilst at the moment I realise that this is only early signs I do find it rather difficult to watch. The odd comment in the school playground about my husband not ‘looking right’ or ‘yeah he looked a bit drunk’ I guess is just something that I’m learning to live with and to not take to heart as we will not hide away in the shadows of disability for he is such a kind wonderful man. So my husband’s best mate tells me on the phone after a good night out at a gig with his mates that that they went to a local pub afterwards. They had only had a couple of drinks but as with these things of course my hubby's balance and speech inevitably became a little more wobbly than usual, all of which his good mates are now becoming accustomed to!

The story first hand from his best mate (who I may add wasn’t there) went like this:

They all go to enter a bar after the gig on a maximum on one/two beers (no one was drunk). They arrive at the door of a pub where the bouncer tells my husband in not so polite terms to ‘do one’ as he's drunk. All his mates of course take umbrage and explain calmly about his physical condition which the bouncer dismisses immediately. All his mates say don’t worry mate to my dear hubby and leave quietly and head to another bar where this was not a problem.

 Life has a way all of its own about really showing its participants that there really are a few very good friends out there who completely have your back. Thank God for them!! The rage when my hubby's best mate informed me of this. I was so so very upset because my husband had not told me as he very much tries to protect us from it all, when really we just want to not be protected, but then I guess that’s marriage right?? It was at that precise moment that I decided to take matters into my own hands. Upon the moral high horse I rode like a knight charging into battle into super protection mode of my best friend/ life hero. Forward I went phone in hand as my weapon of choice to the bar in question and security firm manning that bar defending my husband to the hilt. Words were thrown like ‘disability discrimination act’ and ‘what sort of training do your staff have?’ And ‘can you imagine how you would feel??’ all of which they then vowed to take very seriously. As a mother and a wife it really is instinct I feel to protect my family so that I felt justice had been served.

It was a few weeks later when my hubby and I got a last minute deal for cocktails and dinner when we started to discuss the last year and how awful it had been since diagnosis and with also managing other family illnesses. With a tear in my eye we spoke about some funny moments that had also happened. It was at this point I said to him that I knew about what happened on his night out and how upset I was that he felt he could not tell me himself and that when his mate told me that, I couldn’t not take action... There was quite a long pause followed by complete laughter from him which then set me off too! It turns out that whilst drink does bring on his symptoms and they were exacerbated that night due to tiredness he had also had 8 pints of beer and the pub rightly hadn’t let him in which is why he had not told me !!!

 So the moral of the story I guess is maybe it turned out on this occasion that life at the moment hasn’t changed all that much right now. I have learnt that one thing is for sure: illness or not, I will protect and defend my beautiful family to the hilt. Whilst I struggle with not being able to control any part of this disease process and the impact it has daily on our family I’m still hoping that we have many fun times to look back on. Knowing that life is so precious and fragile makes me lucky to have such a great life best friend to share it with x

(Apologies to all staff in said bar and security staff who may have been affected by my grief stricken moments in living with HD)

Image from OpenClipart.org (public domain)